- The jacket is sheer. The tag even says “M”, as in medium, which I appreciate (even though I accept that I’m not)
- The skirt, well, it’s just heaven. It fits like a glove. It’s comfortable. And I NEVER thought I would love a slit in my skirt, BUT I DO.
- I added my own jewelry, cami and heels and VOILA, you see the awesome result.
- Bonus: my nails just happen to be glittery too!
Before I even start this post, I need you to understand that I am sometimes (ok, always) random and a tiny bit weird. I often wonder if some of the things that go on in my head also go on in other people’s heads. I am convincing myself that they do and I am relying on those people showing up to read this blog. The rest of you, well, you were warned. :)
When I saw this dress online a while back, I was completely drawn to it for two reasons. One, I love the style of being a bit 50’s-ish. Secondly, funerals. Whether you want to admit it or not, or whether you think I’m a total loon, every girl needs a funeral dress. Obviously, this dress is fabulous enough to work for tons of other functions, but I primarily bought it for funerals. Clearly, I don’t sit around anticipating another’s death. I also don’t mean for it to seem as if I treat a funeral like a fashion show.
I do, however, feel like it’s important to look classy and a bit reserved for such an occasion (it’s really the only occasion I believe this for, by the way). You cannot go wrong with pearls (even if they are fake) and a black dress. When I came across this dress I realized that I didn’t have a dress that fit my “funeral belief system” and when I discovered that I could snag this for $20, I jumped right on it. Now, all I need is for someone to die. JUST KIDDING!!!!! I just knew that once I coupled this with my pearls and black heels, that I was definitely going to win any Audrey Hepburn costume contests!
Once the dress arrived, I tried it on and realized it was THE PERFECT funeral dress for any funeral……..except mine. I started thinking about how I would make my funeral different from most (because I always want to be different and MAYBE I have a few control issues – even in my own death). I can respect a classy funeral, after all, I just bought a dress for that exact event. But, I need funeral fun. So, in the event of my untimely death, I am publishing my funeral wishes for all of the interwebs to see……..and maybe to also make sure enough people see it so that my mom feels obligated to carry it out versus putting me in a button up cardigan and pearls! :) Weird? Probably so. Cares? Zero.
Unless you’re an ex that broke up with me and realized how incredibly stupid that decision was and now it’s too late to do anything about it.
I’m pretty sure that the fact that my chest will be stiff should be taken advantage of. Gravity has taken over my boobs these days, so death may cause them to be stiff enough to go back where they were in my twenties and I don’t want to waste it.
Bold red lipstick though, not “I just crawled out of my pimp’s car to go to a job” red.
I don’t want someone up there talking about anything boring. I just want people to tell funny stories. Let me know if you need me to draft a script for everyone.
This one is the most important. It would be great if P!nk is still alive to just have her come do a few tunes. If she’s not, anything upbeat that makes you wanna do a Rocky Balboa, stair type run will do. It won’t even hurt my dead feelings if everyone breaks out into spontaneous dance. If you REALLY loved me, you would all burst out into Don’t Stop Believin mid-funeral.
Everyone at my funeral should be dressed in something bold and fun. I don’t need it looking like a circus freak show….but getting out of your comfort zone is the least you can do for my death wish, right?
Preferably in inflatable form, will do in lieu of flowers. If there are flowers, leave the carnations out of it. I don’t know why they got the dirty job of being the funeral flower, but they are not for me.
First, I want a casket that you can write on. Have colorful sharpies available and leave me a good love note. I’ll know if you skip that part in the line and I will haunt you forever. :) I kid! Next, it needs to include lights. Fun lights on the outside (that could potentially move to the music) and good, Hollywood type lighting around my face that accentuates my red lipstick and long eyelashes. Forgot to mention that before. The eyelashes need to be long. I won’t hate you if you pick ones from the Halloween costume aisle that have a little sparkle to them.
Cover my grave in glitter. Unless you’re my friend James. He hates glitter, so he gets a pass. The disco balls are for tombstone decorations, mostly because in all my years in advertising, nobody has let me incorporate it into any of my campaigns. Actually, anyone who can pull off a real, spinning disco ball as my tombstone will get extra points. I’ll be sure to put in a good word for you with the big man once I meet him.
I think that gets us started. I feel like if you all start with this list, the creative juices will continue to flow and my funeral will be an epic blowout.
I think we can safely say that I feel comfortable with you people to share my weirdness so openly with. Don’t leave me hanging! Share one fun thing you would do at your funeral and reassure me that I’m at least a lovable weirdo! :)
Dress (completely customizable): Eshakti
Necklace: Sam Moon
Shoes: Nine West
What do you do when it’s officially fall but not officially the cool fall weather you need to break out the heavy stuff? You wear this amazing dress…..
This gem has been hiding in my closet too long! Actually, if I am being honest, I want to hide in my closet today too! Since I am an adult who has silly responsibilities such as bills and a faux child, hiding is not an option for me today. (Wah wah wah…..)
What do you do when you are tired, overwhelmed, dealing with a disease that is currently kicking your butt and just don’t feel good? You put this amazing dress on. You also:
- Take a deep breath
- Tell yourself that you are allowed to not be perfect
- Give yourself permission to retreat
- Be as kind as possible with society and just be as quiet as you can
- Be honest with those around you – not mean – just honest. It’s ok to say “I’m not ok today”
- Tap into those encouragers and supporters around you
- Push through the day with the promise of a long, hot bath when you get home
Here’s to a great Tuesday with a great dress that fools me into feeling fabulous!!
P.S. I love the hint of yellow in this dress and the fab glasses!
Is when it is in reference to a floppy hat or floppy disk.
I wasn’t aware I even had a love for either until my exchange student demanded that this hat come home with us a while back (isn’t it a fantastic hat…..and I’m completely swooning over the layers of necklaces). The other floppy love isn’t as much about the floppy disk as it is the times when they were popular. Ok, maybe they were never popular. We just didn’t have any other choices. But, the times that the floppy disk lived in, well, they just seemed simpler. I think we all go through spurts of longing for simpler, don’t we? I actually associate floppy disks with my dad. He was a computer teacher at the time and we had what seemed like a gazillion of them laying around. See, I’m already going back to simpler memories. My dad seemed to make everything simple.
Life is busy. We are moving so fast towards whatever, that we lack the ability to be simple. Sometimes that leads to a state of just “blah”……know what I’m sayin? I am a prime example of this in so many ways that I have lost count. When I get to going too fast, if I’m being cheesy, life just gets a bit floppy. The difference in me now is, that I try to be very aware. I try to slow down every once and a while and examine where I am allowing too much floppy and work towards improvement. I quit beating myself up a long time ago for getting to a state of floppy. Forgiving yourself is important. I just try to note it, stop it at the first acknowledgement, and move forward. What do you do?
Here are where floppy isn’t good for me……Can anyone relate?
- Floppy Friends – It’s taken me a really long time to be ok with not feeling obligated to keep friends around that aren’t good for me. Nobody has to be a jerk about it but I simply cannot allow friendships that are a flop to continue.
- Floppy Boys – I have no idea when it happened or what switch was flipped, but it has been really cool to try the approach of actually being direct and intentional about my dating life. Sure, it has cut a lot of guys out of the mix, but that’s more than ok. I cannot allow myself to give parts of my heart away to someone who gives me floppy effort (or no effort at all). I was SO SCARED to take this new approach for myself, but so far, I am pretty pleased with how it’s going.
- Floppy Habits – they gotta stop. They just do. It is more important than ever, with my recent diagnosis, that I make good choices. If it doesn’t work for the good of my health, or the good of my life goals, it absolutely cannot become a habit in my life. I accept this as a constant work in progress for me! I know that if there is one crack in my life, floppy will creep in and take over before I turn around. Obviously, I am not 100% every day, but having a good army to stand guard helps!
I’m thinking I need to track down a few old floppy disks and keep them handy as a reminder that I can’t let anything but my cool hat get too floppy!
Let’s have a great week. Want to?
When is it ok to wear sequins to work?
1. Sequins are better than boys today. It’s the first couple of days in a long time that I haven’t thought about my last heart break. I am moving along from it in way healthier ways than ever before (because, unfortunately, this is the 3rd heart break from the same person). The way I felt when I put this sequined top on (and the one I wore a few days ago) is honestly better than any guy has made me feel in ages.
Have you ever wondered if you can you love a bigger girl, guys? The answer is yes. Today, on top of a great Shopping In My Closet outfit, I bring you a little Q&A that might help bring a little clarity. Hope this helps! Be sure that you share this with friends. You too big girls. The world needs awareness and answers to these important questions 😝
1. Will loving a big girl kill me?
Answer: No. You won’t die. However it should be noted that a girl of any size could make you wish you were dead if you cross her.
2. Should I hide my food when I first date a bigger girl?
Answer: No. We do not want your food. We are perfectly capable of getting our own. You should, however, hide your food if you are a grown man that lives off of Cosmic Brownies in a box and Mountain Dew.
3. Should I tell my big girl that she is big? Even if it is out of love?
Answer: No. Do not insult her intelligence. Unless she is blind, doesn’t have a mirror, or has never passed by a window, this subject should never be addressed by you. You think she doesn’t know she is big. What would be big would be the size of the mistake you make by thinking you are holy enough to bring this to her attention. Refer to number one’s ending statement.
4. Will a big girl crush me while we are making love?
Answer: Well, first let me ask you some questions. Do you weigh less than 50 pounds? Are you Channing Tatum? I think you need to worry less about her crushing you and more about how you can make her wish she never had to leave the bedroom.
5. Will a big girl increase my grocery bill if we become serious enough to grocery shop together?
Answer: Yes. Because most likely she will require you to purchase more than those Cosmic Brownies and Mountain Dew.
Answer: Well, then don’t screw it up.
7. Will washing my big girl’s clothes require more laundry detergent?
Answer: Nope. Not anymore than your crap-stained underwear might.
8. What if my friends make fun of me for dating a big girl?
Answer: Two things: first, make 100% certain that you are equivalent to Channing Tatum so that your judging the hotness of the girl you are dating is completely justified. Next, break up with your girl immediately. Because surrounding yourself with friends like that CLEARLY indicates that you do not deserve the love of a big girl to begin with. Lastly, gather yourself and your friends and find the nearest cliff and have a jumping off of it party.
9. How can I get my big girl to lose a few pounds for me? I really like her, but she would be even prettier if she could just drop a few pounds. You know, for her health.
Answer: you can’t. What you can do is take your tiny little brain and find a mirror. Stand in front of the mirror and repeat after me…”It’s not about me. It’s not my journey. I should work on not being the biggest tool on the planet.”
10. Are all big girls as funny and cool as you, Alicia? Do they look as good shopping out of their closet and sporting this cool faux leather jacket as you?
Answer: sadly, no. Probably not. I’m kidding. There are tons of us out there!! The coolness over floweth!!
I love writing. I love shopping in my closet. Lately I have been doing more of both than usual and I cannot tell you what it does for my soul. Writing really is great therapy. Shopping in my closet really is helpful on the pocketbook.
I am far from being a disciplined person. I am the poster child for falling off wagons. I have no idea why I stop doing things that are so good for me. But, I do. And I’m hoping someone else out there does too. Ok, maybe I shouldn’t hope that someone else falls off the wagon as much as I do. But, I do hope someone out there at least can understand what I am saying.
Last week was a good week. I was full of routine, and words to type, and clothes to brag about. I was ahead in my writing. And then busyness came to visit. Hate it when he shows up! :) Before I knew it, my weekend was gone and even faster than that, Monday night showed up. Scratch that. I am now sitting on Tuesday night with a VERY early Wednesday morning staring me in the face.
I want to write something epic. I want to put together a beautiful collage of outfit goodness. But the truth is, I just don’t have it in me. I am exhausted. I am overwhelmed with life right now. And I am really angry at my newly diagnosed disease with medicine that makes me almost sick enough to call my momma. The worst part? None of that matters. It really doesn’t. Because I still have to function in society as a productive human. The faux kid has to be fed. The work has to be done. The dog has to be walked. The laundry has to be tended to. The list goes on.
Can we be even more honest with each other for a second? The last thing I want to think about or hear is “it could be worse.” Or “Too blessed to be stressed.”
Yeah, I said it. Now what? Well, I’ll tell you?
1. I don’t have to be Positive Polly. I don’t have to try and inspire or pretend like I’m just dandy. What I do have to do to stay mentally healthy is own my emotion. I have to, but that doesn’t mean that others have to own my emotions as well. Being truthful with yourself about how you feel is not a bad thing. Negatively affecting others is.
2. Being all the things I listed above are ok. Letting them move in and dwell is not. Thank them for stopping by, but push them on their way down the road.
3. Do it anyway. Oh how I hated when my dad would say that. But he is right. Had I kept from writing tonight, the “blah” would’ve won and set me a few steps back. I am trying every single day lately to do things that move me forward. I wrote anyway. I promised myself one paragraph and the outfit pic was the least I could do. Now, look where we are! Lots of words later!
4. DON’T BE MEAN! To others for sure, but ESPECIALLY not to yourself.
I already feel better! Don’t you? I came across some oldies outfit pics that I never posted, so I am sharing those today. Some of my favs!